this day in history

11/09/2013

About this time (4.30pm) 18 years ago today I went into labour for the final time. Fraser was on his way..

He didn't take terribly long, arriving about 10 pm. so Labour was only about 6 hours from start to finish. I have a clear memory of tucking him in next to me in bed and the two of us falling asleep the first time he woke up crying.. It was to carry on that way for many years. He much preferred to sleep with me holding him, or in bed with him.


Yvonne Harding looked after Matthew while Phil and I went to the hospital and Mum joined us there. We had a room with a bath this time and Marie Robinson in attendance. Marie was Matt's midwife too and this time we did not invite any doctors. The labour went well and he was delivered on the bed with me standing up holding onto Phil. Marie is a great catcher.

Giving birth is one of those moments in your life you never forget, assuming you are not too drugged up, and I was not.. This birth was easier than Matthew's. For that one I needed some medical intervention. Matt paved the way for his brother.

I had good pregnancies and enjoyed the experience. Both boys were early with Matt at 37 weeks and Fraser at 39. so they never kept me waiting.. That happened plenty of times later on..

Knowing we were expecting a boy child we had picked his first name, after a couple of other Frasers we knew. My Grandad was a Scot so there was a bit of honoring that as well. We didn't have his second name picked out exactly but I had thought Fraser Jonathon had a nice ring to it. When he was born I changed my mind and decided on Fraser Timothy.. I still don't really know why I did that. There are no other Timothys in our family.

We didn't stay in hospital long. maybe two days? and I was happy to go home. The other lady in our room had a very big family who visited a lot. We have a lovely photo of Matthew meeting Fraser. He was quite taken with him.

Fraser had a few birthday celebrations over the years, mostly at our place with a few friends invited to play or a trip to McDonald's, laser strike and later paintball.  That stopped a few years ago and we started just going out to dinner for the boy's birthdays. We didn't know enough of their friends to invite them to do much of anything else.

Sept 11 2001 was his 6th birthday.. the next day I was really relieved we are so many hours ahead of the states because the twin towers fell overnight. We had had a party for Fraser the day before and his birthday was not spoiled by that tragedy, although the date is now memorable for most people.

When Phil and I separated the property agreement required that I pay him back $50k that he left in the house. I never truly believed he deserved that money. I had to pay it back by today, Fraser's 18th birthday. I lived in fear of not being able to do that from the minute I signed the forms in about 2005 until January this year, when the bank told me I would definitely be able to refinance, and did I want any extra money for anything else while I was at it? I bought a reliable car, and refinanced in June so I would not have to worry about it now. Two fears done away with at once. I love my new car.

As long as I can remember Fraser has been waiting to be older.. he wanted to be 15 so he could sit his licence,  then he got it and moved on to his restricted at 16 at which time they changed the rules and you were not allowed your full licence until you were 18. and now he IS 18 so he can sit the full licence.

He  always been annoyed that he could not buy cigarettes, so he just did it anyway. At 17 he moved in with his then girlfriend, and at 18 is now flatting with a mate. Not too far from home although we don't see him much. Even though he was too young to buy it Fraser doesn't seem to have ever had trouble sourcing alcohol. I think he is ok with it, not too much binge drinking I hope.  I will buy him bourbon for his birthday, so it is a sure bet that he will enjoy the gift.

This month he is going to Brisbane to visit his best friend.
He arranged the trip and the new passport himself.

Now he could join coastguard , but he did that a few months ago, the first person in Wellington to join at just 17.  And now he can vote, buy cigarettes and alcohol, apply for credit, and be respected as an adult instead of as a 17 year old acting like an adult.

My baby is growing up.



Photos .  13 yrs, &  17 yrs
NOTE TO SELF scan some of the photos from when the kids were small and photos were printed from negatives..